Radio Shack Executive Decision Maker
When faced with tough decisions, some high-priced executives turn to their crack staff of analysts and consultants. Others might go into hyper data-acquisition mode before generating a massive spreadsheet of all the facts. If you're a smart exec who wants to look calm and cool (and can't bear the thought of all of that data processing) just reach into your desk drawer and pull out this 1980's Executive Decision Maker from Radio Shack.
The EDM is a roughly 2" cube, clad in the finest simulated walnut finish. Two switches unleash the Decision Maker's decisive power. One switch turns the unit on, the other launches the complex "random" algorithm and the determined ticking and bleeps that accompany every decision making process.
Eventually the red LED indicator comes to rest in one of the six possible outcomes. Unless the answer is "ask again", you can simply slip the Electronic Decision Maker back into your mahogany desk and still make your tee time.
I suppose that plebeians can get a similar determination by rolling a die or flipping a coin, but neither of those has fake walnut woodgrain or bear the legend; "executive". The only question remaining in my mind is whether this device has ever been used to actually make important decisions. It would explain a lot.