Furutech DFV-1 Record Flattener
By James Grahame
Let's do things backwards today. This thing costs $1480, so you can't afford it. It's basically a gigantic waffle iron that heats warped LP records to a maximum of 65 degrees Celsius ('Bagdad at noon' in Fahrenheit) and flattens them like pancakes.
The space saving vertical design looks a tad like an old Bang & Olufsen stereo. You simply clip an LP onto the internal spindle, close the cover and tap a little white button to start the cooking process. After a few minutes, the sweet aroma of baked vinyl will permeate the room and you'll be presented with a newly flattened yet miraculously unharmed disc. Just add whipped cream and the fruit topping of your choice...