Retro Thing

Wear Your Politics On Your Sleeve... Or Lapel

It's been a long, negative, and cynical campaign running for President of the United States. Even those of you living outside of the U.S. haven't been spared this seemingly interminable process. That's to be expected I guess since we have the best country in the world (hooray!), the best political process in the world (wince), the smartest, most enterprising and best-looking citizenry in the world (bewildered smirk), etc. etc.  If all of that could even be true, it sure doesn't feel like it. Can't we just say that we have the best strawberry-rhubarb pie in the world and be content with that?

I shouldn't sound so despondent. This is as close as I get to following a sport. Every four years U.S. citizens get to wear their politics on their sleeves - and their lapels. Campaign buttons have been around since at least the late 1800s when mass production make it easier and cheaper than ever to create a giveaway of a candidate's likeness. Thankfully, buttons are also cheap enough to leave room for funny ones. This election thing is a serious business, but it's nice to sneak in a smile when you're pulling down that lever.

I found a big sack of buttons at a thrift store. All indications are that they are from one person's collection, and there were a number that are politically oriented. Let's have a look at a personal pinback time capsule.

Okay - this one didn't come from the thrifted bag I just mentioned. I'm a sucker for any candidate who makes swoopy analog music on the first instrument that you didn't have to touch to play. Obama has been portrayed both as some kind of uber-nerd and wizard, it seems like the theremin would be his jam. Obviously this is just a Photoshop composite (and not an especially good one at that), but it reminds us how important it is for a candidate to reach across the aisle - especially if there's a theremin over on that side.

Pretty much every election inspires TV fans of one polarizing character or another to put him up for president. For those of you who don't remember, J.R. Ewing was from the nighttime soap opera Dallas that ran from 1978 to (unbelievably)1991. The show was all about dirty business, lurid sex, backstabbing, even an "assassination" attempt in the famous "Who shot J.R." cliffhanger that left everyone guessing for months whether the lovable/detestable character was dead or alive. Those all sound like great qualifications to me for any president, past or future.

This is a more serious "message" button, showing double X chromosome support for the Reagan and Bush presidential run from nearly 30 years ago. Say what you will about how much women ultimately benefited from that ticket, but this button does have a clever feminine reference hidden in plain sight. Look how the "o" atop the "f" are connected to look like the astrological Venus symbol for "female". Nice, eh?

Here's an oldie that's true no matter what year you're casting your vote. Taking off from the sci-fi cliche, "take me to your leader", I've seen this button many times over the years. The idea of the government not just leading, but dipping deep into our pockets is an idea that's always going to be there. Maybe I'll wear this pin today along with one advocating the ruthless J.R. Ewing for president. I have a feeling that these are two buttons that voters on both sides can finally agree on.

[note: please don't turn the comments section into a bully pulpit for either candidate. Jokes and intelligently snide comments are always welcome (heck, they're our bread and butter around here), but we don't want our nice comments section to turn into a screechy mess. Inflammatory or cruel comments will be expunged, Nixon-style.]

Pac-Man Matching Necktie & Ceramics

Today it's not strange to see a fully grown adult wearing a My Little Pony t-shirt. Well, it is strange... but that's beside the point. What I mean to say is that our pop culture clothes have grown to include lots of treasured childhood characters, no matter what your age is. That wasn't always the case. It used to be much more rare to show your enthusiasm for your pop culture faves in an "adult" context... where "adult" is defined by a desire for a sad polyester necktie and cheap ceramics.

Adult pop culture of the 70s and 80s had all the usual things - Mickey Mouse T-shirts, sport mascots, concert posters.... but of course video game characters hadn't really hit yet. A pixelated greyscale tank or Pong's phosphorescent slash don't exactly make for exciting garments.

That all changed when Pac-Man started gobbling the world's small change. He's often credited as being the first character in video gaming, I know what they mean, though it's funny to think of Pac-Man as having much of a personality. He's more or less characterized by his having a significant eating disorder.

Being the star of such a colorful gaming phenom made Pac-Man the star of one of the first gluts of video gaming merchandise. As a kid I had Pac-Man tube socks for goodness sake, but it wasn't only all about kid stuff. Check out these grown up Pac-Man and Ms. Pac-Man ceramics and a necktie.

Nothing says "grown-up" like a maroon necktie - the color necktie most favored by my youth's substitute teachers. This is an officially licensed bit of gear, with small tweaks applied to the look of the characters to be at least a little toned down.

The ceramics look like the sort of cheap thing that I might have given as a misguided mother's day gift. C'mon... Ms. Pac-Man is a lady, right? The inclusion of the Ms. tells us that this is part of a later merch push (there's an "82" scraped into the bottom).

I prefer a world where grown ups have more ways of showing their playful side. Too bad that the days are gone where wearing a Pac-Man tie would be outrageous in a boardroom... or ridiculed when wrapped around the neck of your new sub for Social Studies.

[thanks for the Pac-Man tie, Jeffrey!]

Retro Picture Frames At Target

I was just at my local Target store and found a couple of cute picture frames that cater to those of us who are Old Media Old Timers. They're not available from Target's website - these are specialty items that you have to go into the store to find.

I'm not sure what they're made of (a testimony to the modern world that I can't tell what sort of space age material we're dealing with here), I think they're made of wood, but the frames may be some sort of plastic. In any case, they're adorable and affordable.

For $5.95 you can pick up either a television inspired frame, or a sketchy looking cassette (with room for two photos appropriately). Funny to have reached the age that even a mass market retailer like Target is catering to my nostalgia. I've found that these non-catalog items are sometimes not stocked too deeply, so you may want to trot to your local Target soon. Let us know if you need some pictures of James and myself to fill up your snazzy new frames.

[For the cynics among you, no... Retro Thing didn't get paid for this post.]

A Retro Kitsch Look At The Olympics

I'm not much of a sports fan (which you can probably tell by my soft-serve ice cream muscle tone), but I've always had an admiration for the Olympics. The opening and closing ceremonies of the UK Olympics were lavish, though occasionally confusing - and it didn't help at all that U.S. TV correspondents felt obliged to fill the air with nervous prattle whenever the action dipped below a fever pace.

Before this year's Olympics started, I had a running list of what world-famous UK icons would be recognized in the ceremonies. I was happy to see James Bond, Monty Python, and of course The Beatles well represented, but felt a bit slighted that Doctor Who - a show about to celebrate its half-century, and a worldwide hit like never before - was not in sight. Though my ears did prick up in the opening ceremony when I heard the unmistakable sound of the Doctor's TARDIS during a musical number. There was apparently supposed to be a salute to British TV that got nixed, so all I can figure is that a kindred sound man sneaked the signature sound effect into the broadcast anyway (it'll be hard to forgive the current producers of Doctor Who if they don't figure out a way to fit this real-world TARDIS event into the plot of their show.)

Lots of retro musical acts, but I wasn't treated to my UK favorites. No glimpse of Peter Gabriel, no historic reunion by The Smiths, and the only sign of the mercurial Kate Bush was "Running Up that Hill" (a signature song for one of the bands I was once in) used as a backing track in the closing ceremony - replete with an unnecessary re-recording of the vocals. If you're a U.S  Kate fan wondering how you missed the performance, it's not your fault. The number was cut from our broadcast for some reason.

So the Olympics may be gone, but as always the souvenirs will live on. In 1988, Kodak offered The Winner 110 camera, with a small Olympic decal to make it all official. If you remember 110 film, it was scarcely a "winner" format. The negative was a quarter the size of 35mm, so prints were always a bit grainy, helped little by the low quality cameras that usually used the format. It wasn't too bad a compromise though for a cheap and portable camera.

The other item I came across was this Hallmark ornament from 1996. Sold as a $30 collectible then, nigh worthless now. It's one of those ornaments that you plug into a light string and watch while the ornament itself lights up. This one has a cute flickering flame effect to emulate the torch being lit at the Atlanta Olympics. It seems a bit out of season to depict the feiry symbol of the Summer Olympics on your winter tree, I won't make a fuss. Open flame was part of every Christmas when I was growing up, but that's a story for another time.

So I enjoyed the Olympics overall, and it was fun running across these past souvenirs of Olympics gone by... but if they want to bring back full-on Olympic fever, maybe the Games shouldn't happen every 18 months.

Ancient Bakelite Three Prong A.C. Adapter

Some years ago, I started a project to convert all the power taps in my mother's house from 2 prong to grounded 3 prong outlets. I got halfway through before stopping. I had the sudden realization that the moment I finished installing 3 prong outlets, the U.S. would introduce a 4 prong outlet.

That hasn't happened yet - you can thank me later. Like everyone else, when I need to plug a three prong appliance into a two prong socket I simply use one of those those grey adapter "cheater plugs" (colloquially called "3 to 2s" in the film trade). I'm pretty sure that there have been some of these little grey workhorses around the house for all of my life...

It never occurred to me that these adapters could look any different, but gosh - a Bakelite one! Who knew? Makes sense, really. Before the plastics that we know today, Bakelite was perfect for electrical applications since it was a safe insulator. Bakelite is mostly gone these days (though there are a few applications where it still excels, like car brake pads) as it was a very labor intensive process to create. Even this 3 to 2 adapter is fairly involved (it has a screw holding a masonite bottom and a whole bunch of little parts in place).

The collector crowd has boosted the value of practically anything made out of Bakelite. The most desirable objects are often old televisions and radios, but let's not forget the 3 to 2 adapter. All of those cool bakelite appliances gotta plug into something...

Hit The Slopes In These 80s "Wearable Art" Sunglasses

Like so many of our favorite Retro Things, these shades are a lot of things. They're a bit kitschy, a bit 80s, and a bit baffling. You may not notice until you look at the photo closely, but I've got little plastic skiers on my sunglasses - and yes, that's just my nose in the photo. It's not a ski hill.

The copyright is 1988 on "The Original UnexSpecTed" glasses. The copy on the back refers to the glasses as "wearable art", and petitions the wearer to treat them tenderly. No doubt about that - these little skiers are quite fragile. I don't like to make fun of someone's art, but is gluing some model choo-choo figures onto a pair of cheap sunglasses really "art"?

I bought these in the 80s at a thrift store for a buck or two, sparing me the undoubtedly high art fair price someone originally splashed out for these specs. I'd love to know what the original price was. I think I've worn them once because they are just so fragile. I only wear dark glasses in the summer, and having little skiers shooshing around my eye sockets seems both out-of-season and hypocritical.

I've only ever been skiing once (very unsuccessfully). I get the idea of wearing sunglasses on the hill so you don't go snowblind, but these little plastic ski bums on my specs wouldn't make it through the bunny hill. If you're ever going to wear UnexSpecTed glasses, I think it best to simply perch them gingerly on the end of your nose while you're sipping cocoa back at the lodge.

What other themes could you make out of little sporty HO model railroad guys and 80s sunglasses? Swimming? Fishing? Seems like you could create your own line of UnexSpecTed glasses by visiting your local hobby shop and warming up the hot glue gun. Oh yeah - here's my favorite bit...

That's right... these may be cheap sunglasses from the drugstore, but gluing on the skiers merits a "handmade in the U.S. A." sticker I guess.

Oh, and in case you're wondering about the comfort and visibility of UnexSpecTed glasses, having tiny people and a little pine tree in your blind spot isn't all bad. That part of my face always needed a little sprucing up (that's conifer humor, son!).

What do you think? Lame excuse for an objet d'art, or cute and clever novelty? Should we try to find artist T. R. Peters and ask him?

Contra Sweater - 8-bit Knit

PLEASE tell me that this belogs to one of our readers. If it does, you have the most badass grandma in the history of badass grandmas.

Sadly, it's a Photoshop fake (the gradient on the "C" in the logo is a tip off) - but you were pretty excited there for a few seconds, weren't you?

3 Ring Circus Rumpus Room

There's just no way for me to discuss how great this room is without sounding envious. I may be 40, have my own place and a car that I can drive anywhere, but damn... I want a room that looks like a circus tent.

I'm not sure where this photo originated from. I don't think it's from a catalog as there's too much custom work going on here. My thinking is that it's a photo from a home improvement magazine, or a kid's room ideabook. The canvas panels are a colorful way to separate this space from what I guess is the rest of the basement. The red & white fabric up top is camouflaging some ductwork, though I don't know if the local fire marshall would approve. Check out the pipe camouflaged as a giraffe's neck.

Are we thinking that this photo is from the 60s? The TV series "Mad Men" is re-educating people about the sheer amount of drinking that went on in certain crowds back then. Not surprising if even the kids have their own bar! Check out Buzzcut BIlly back there making time with one of the ladies over a mug of ice tea.

Okay, so I'm still a little jealous, but my feelings have subsided a bit since realizing that this isn't a page from some pie-in-the-sky rich kid catalog (I hope). I prefer to think of this as an ambitious project that is actually within reach of folks with a bit of ingenuity and a couple weekends to spare. What a great way to liven up an otherwise dead and useless space. The overall scheme is clever too with the little lion's cage above the bar, and the paper lanterns that are reminiscent of balloons. Check out the cute "peep show" sign over the color TV set.

Wait a minute. These 60s kids had their own color TV, and our family didn't get one til the mid 80s? I'm back to being mad again.

1950s Typewriter For The Ladies & Special Nail Polish

The atomic age office brought with it reams of typing, work which was usually reserved for women. Underwood, the famous typewriter manufacturer, responded to a consistent complaint of secretaries; chipped fingernails. Instead of chuckling at the stereotype, let's examine Underwood's two-pronged solution - a newly shaped typewriter key, and Underwood nail polish.

The Underwood 150 introduced half-moon shaped keys, giving long fingernails a chance to slip into the spaces between keys rather than striking the usual large button-shaped keys head on. Now you can preserve your blood-red talons rather than risk (quoting the ad): "short unfashionable fingernails". The typewriter also promised "kitten soft" key action (who writes this stuff?), so you don't have to mash your fingers down on the keys so much just to make the 150 work. I'll remember that next time I'm slamming out my resume on a baby cat.

The other tool to keep your fingernails and hands (again, quoting the ad...) "lovely to look at, lovely to touch" (they're not encouraging inter-office hanky-panky here, are they?), Underwood also introduced their own nail polish. It looks like it might have been more of a free marketing come-on rather than something you'd pick up at the five and dime. The "Underwood Red" polish promises durability above all, and claims to have been styled by "Beauty Consultants". After thinking about it, I suppose the combination of impact-resistant nail polish and the specially-shaped keys on the 150 could actually have helped eliminate the irritation of chipped nails. Though, why didn't that half-moon key shape stick around? Next time you see a woman with smashed up fingernails that can only be battle scars from a mid-century typing pool, maybe you can ask her for us.

Eat Your Way Through Atari's 40th Anniversary

This year will see a lot of Atari celebrating the founding of the company 40 years ago. You can expect that  we'll do our fair share here on Retro Thing, but you may also see some retro punters take a shot. Target has teamed up with General Mills to offer kid's cereals in classic packaging (again). The idea is to bring back some of that 70s vibe when all that mattered on a Saturday morning was slamming down some Lucky Charms, watching SuperFriends and edging up that Space Invaders score.

The nostalgic packaging is cute, but the "Atari Activities" promised on the box are a little pale. Let's ignore the fact that a sterile name like "Atari Activities" doesn't exactly sound "Totally Radical".   of the box has some puzzles and riddles that I'm not sure would actually engage the kids who are supposed to eat the cereal, or even a retro gaming hound like me. There is an online version of Centipede you can play, so I guess that's something... but I was hoping for at least a lame 70's era cereal prize like an Atari sticker, or a patch or something. It would be great to have a little souvenir of so many years of Atari fun. I don't fault General Mills for cashing in on Atari nostalgia, but I am disappointed that they cheaped out so badly.

IKEA Helps Store Your Records In Style

I've joked many times that collecting records qualifies as a "lifestyle choice". Once you're bitten by the vinyl bug, you'll find yourself scouring the bins at collector shops, scanning the tables at flea markets, and sorting through boxes at the thrift to find your next treasure. It doesn't take long for the records to start stacking up and needing a home of their own. When LPs were more of a mainstay, there were plenty of storage choices out there, but these days its often specialized and very expensive.

That's what makes IKEA's Expedit shelving system a godsend for those of us who have too many records. The biggest one costs in the range of $200, and is perfect for holding thousands of records. Once I'd discovered this for myself, I started sharing the word and found that many of my other record collector friends found the same solution. I've had mine for close to ten years without a hint of sag (you can even see mine in the background of episodes of Retro Thing TV). So there is a whole network of DJs and vinyl fans who have made the trek to their local IKEA (or Amazon) to find a home for their LPs.

A clever Kickstarter project just secured the funding to create a set of front doors for the Expedit that would also display your favorite LP art. I'm totally on board as it's not only stylish, but it's easy to change the whole look of the unit with a whim. Though because it's a small run, it looks like it won't be able to match IKEAs usual economy for these sorts of things i.e. it's not going to be IKEA-level cheap. Looks like we're talking $35 per door.

Even more, I'd also really like IKEA to get on something like this custom DJ booth a friend turned me on to.

Let's make it happen, IKEA - I hereby dub this fantastic contrivance the Expedit 360!

links:

No Ikea nearby? Order your Expedit from Amazon.
Kickstarter project to create LP fronted doors

Exquisite... What Is It? #001 - Early Hacked Phone

From time to time we like to march out a bit of retro tech that we have no idea about. It's a lot of fun for us to watch the discussion light up in the comments section of a post with guesses as to what it is we've found.

It used to take a lot more work/solder/toggle switches to jailbreak a phone, leaving it bare or your own purposes. Here's how retro telecom geniuses used to do it. This device looks like it started life as a rotary phone, but then got the deluxe accessory package. In place of the dial, we've got a perfectly fitting speaker with the Motorola logo. The handset has a red earpiece and microphone (with a particularly nasty red rubber earcup added). The receiver has a red momentary push-button near the earpiece. You can see the red & green indicator lights on top near the cradle as well.

Moving to the front, there are three toggle switches. A three position toggle dutifully DYMO-labelled "SQU", and two more marked "DIR" and "SPKR". There are also what look like two push-buttons, but I think they're lights as well. On the side is a serious looking "A.F. GAIN" knob, and in the back is a 1/4" jack.

I want to think that this may have come from the Motorola factory that's relatively close by, but I supposed Motorola could just be the brand of the speaker (which fits perfectly where the dial used to go). The phone is a standard Western Electric chassis (the phone I grew up with was a cousin to this one). It's a bit homebrew and cobbled together, but clearly by a pro. I doubt this was a commercial product, but nor do I think it's a HAM operator's afternoon's fun in the workshop.

Any ideas?

Making Dymo-mite Labels One Letter at a Time

If you scan the ads inserted in your Sunday paper in the coming weeks — you do subscribe to a Sunday newspaper, right? — you'll notice many stores holding sales on organizational gear like storage bins. I assume that's either because people buy a lot of that stuff after receiving too many Christmas presents or because "getting organized" is a common New Year's resolution. Either way, it's fair to say we're entering the organization season. And if there's one thing a competent organizer needs, it's a labelmaker.

Dymo has been making and selling labelmakers since 1958. The company started out making them for industrial and business clients. (In its old ads, Dymo said its reps would happily come to your place of business and label "any six items" to show off how useful the labels were.) The technology is dead simple: Select a letter on the font wheel, squeeze the trigger and the raised letter is pressed into the malleable plastic or metal substrate. The plastic would turn white from the stress of being stamped, making the label easy to read.

The firm lays claim to introducing the first personal labelmaker and it democratized the gizmos with inexpensive embossers. It sold a range of machines, from simple plastic ones for home use to metal "executive" models with carrying cases and multiple font wheels. Other companies got into the game and soon seemingly everyone had the ability to punch out labels for things that clearly needed no marking. (I mean, did anyone actually put their phone number on their sunglasses?) In the 1970s, the company sold 7 million embossers per year.

Though they might seem slightly antiquated in this age of customizable print-your-own labels, I have noticed that embossed labels are still relevant. The Dallas Cowboys continue to use the labels to denote which helmet belongs to whom. You can get fonts that look like the embossed labels, so that your next PowerPoint presentation can have that extra pop. And of course the embossing font motif pops up in logos: The NBC show "Chuck" uses it, presumably because the labels were once a staple of retail nametags, and the Paramount Vantage movie imprint relies on it too.

Dymo is now a unit of Newell Rubbermaid and primarily a seller of printer-style labelmakers with keyboards and screens and a zillion options. But it still makes a couple of embossers, including one that goes for about $10. They seem aimed at scrapbookers now, though the company also manufactured one recently for kids that actually spoke the selected letter. You also can also find vintage ones without much trouble. (If you're looking for old ones, a vertical font wheel is a nice option.)

I find them fun to use but also finicky and occasionally laborious. My model seems to regard the font baseline as mere suggestion; spinning the font wheel in same direction sometimes helps. The key to consistent lettering is even finger pressure on the trigger, which is a challenge. Then again, those innate errors are definitely part of the charm. And surely charm is what you're after when you label your new storage bins.

Lights Out For Incandescent Bulbs - Hoarding Begins

Reports are coming in that folks are snapping up remaining stocks of incandescent bulbs before the end of the year. January 1st marks the start of the Federal phaseout of traditional light bulbs in the United States. While many are unaware of the upcoming ban, 13% of U.S. residents are reportedly stocking up on the 130 year old symbol of American ingenuity and invention.

Home Depot has reported higher than normal sales in these last few weeks as they blow out their back stocks. I'll admit, I picked up a couple dozen bulbs myself. Yes, I too have joined the Incandescent Underground. I have mostly replaced the lights around my apartment with CFL and LED lights, but there are a couple of old lamps that just don't look right with new style bulbs. There's also a fixture in a dark and cold corner of the apartment (where I tend to write Retro Thing posts, coincidentally) where I actually rely on the little bit of extra heat kicked off by the bulb.

There are those who are turning this into a political issue, unhappy that the government is regulating what they can and cannot stick into their sockets. The Republican House has blocked the funds that were originally allotted for enforcing the January 1st ban (make of that what you will), and enterprising bulb sellers have come up with all kinds of strategies to keep you filled with filament fired light. One outfit has gone so far as to relabel their incandescent bulbs as mini-heaters. Yup - that's how we'll save the planet... why address a problem head-on when we can just relabel it?

I'm sure that the news will feature those outliers who will only defy the darkness with old fashioned bulbs, and we will certainly hear many stories of folks who have their garages packed to the ceiling with old fashioned bulbs. Maybe we'll see an inflated future market for light bulbs the same way as we've seen for high flush toilets (Hard to believe, but yes... I recently read about an older high flush toilet changing hands [ewww] for $600 on Ebay).

Here's another question that no one seems to be addressing. A lightbulb floating over someone's head has ong been the symbol of a bright idea. What'll it be now? A CFL? An LED? I'm going to look pretty weird walking around with a diode floating over my head.

The Sweet Sounds Of The Classic PEZ MP3 Player

In 2005, MP3 players were still an up and coming thing. 512 Megs didn't seem like a ridiculously small storage space, the iPod wasn't yet the only game in town, and we'd come along far enough to have collectioble MP3 players too. One of the first articles I wrote here on Retro Thing was about an unusual MP3 player - one that fit into a Game Boy Color.... but even that one doesn't approach the kitsch value of the the PEZ MP3 player.

News of this nostalgic MP3 player seemed to hit every gadget "blog" (also a new-ish idea at the time) back then. It wasn't an official product of the candy company - rather it was the dream of online entrepreneur Patrick Misterovich, who licensed the iconic design from PEZ. The player is the same size as a genuine PEZ dispenser, and the plastic boy head on top a duplicate of one of the first collectible PEZ dispensers back in 1955.

When you flip open the head, instead of being greeted by that familiar chalky candy, instead there's a power switch. One side of the player features simple navigation controls (forget any playlists here people - this is just a very basic player), as well as the mini USB player for loading up the built in memory. The headphone jack is in the dispenser's nape, and it's all powered by a single AAA battery.

The player was a limited edition of 1200 (though there are conflicting reports,  there may be more out there), with the promise of more designs to come. As it turned out, the plastic faced boy model was the only style to ever hit the market (which seems odd - all you'd have to do for future models is change heads, right?), so this model became a hot collectible. Even when it was new, the player was on the expensive side at $100 for 512 megs of non-expandable memory. Nevertheless, it apparently made Patrick Misterovich an internet millionaire, at least according to one report. These days, your only hope of finding a player is on Ebay where they are quite scarce, and can command over a hundred bucks.

Sadly with all that MP3 player technology crammed into the dispenser, there is no room left over for any candy. I wish they'd left room for at least one of the candy bricks,,. just for emergency purposes, you understand.

related:
the first mp3 player
mp3 player in the shape of a cassette
Elaborate mp3 system for Game Boy that never got very far